Funny Parent Tweets

After calling a Muslim child & his family "Pakistani", this grown adult man says "sorry, it was a small apartment complex issue. I didn't mean it". That's precisely the point. The casualness with which Indian Muslims are subjected to harassment for petty disagreements. I hope he goes to jail

Can we drop this “good man” narrative? He was one of the architects of the lawfare state, who demonised entire sections of society because they didn’t buy into his two-tier human rights agenda. He refused full enquiry into the rape gang scandal yet intervened to ensure brutal summary justice for those prosecuted in the wake of the Southport outrage. He supported Corbyn, sat in his shadow cabinet, knowing the deep vein of antisemitism that runs through the man and his supporters. He took gifts, not just political donations, for him and his family in exchange for influence. He tried to give away a strategic asset at vast political and financial expense to the country to keep his fellow leftist lawyers happy. He has sought to undermine Brexit and tie the hands of future governments without ever seeking a mandate to overturn the 2016 referendum. He has run away from every difficult decision, failing to reform welfare or sack Miliband and reverse his insane energy policies. But he’s a “good man”. Come off it!

Even if Beyoncé is trolling y’all back, even if Beyoncé is doing PR, even if Beyoncé is choosing her husband—she can do that. She or he didn’t start it; Nicki did. So Beyoncé isn’t allowed to protect her husband when Nicki has been coming at him and their family unwarranted? But when people call the registered sex offender out, Nicki can defend that and it’s okay? No one else can defend their family, only Nicki? Y’all sound crazy with the buffoonery.

Lionel Messi when asked about potentially becoming the player with the most goals and most assists in World Cup history tonight against Austria: 🗣️ “Honestly, records were never the reason I started playing football. When I was a child, I only dreamed about playing, competing, and wearing Argentina's shirt.” “If one goal or one assist brings me closer to those records, of course it is something beautiful and something I will always be proud of. But the truth is that my focus has always been on helping the team and making Argentina stronger.” “What makes me happiest is not thinking about numbers. What makes me happiest is seeing my teammates celebrate, seeing our fans smile, and knowing we are moving forward together as a group.” “I have been lucky enough to play in many World Cups, alongside incredible teammates who helped me throughout this journey. Records like these are never achieved alone.” “If those moments come tonight, then it will be something special for my family, my teammates, and everyone who has supported me throughout my career. But the most important thing will always be Argentina winning.” “At the end of the day, goals and assists are remembered. But what stays forever is fighting for your country, competing for your people, and leaving everything on the pitch every single time you wear this badge.” “If history comes tonight, it comes. If it doesn't, nothing changes. The dream remains the same helping Argentina achieve something special.”

They continue to give out Irish citizenship like snuff at a wake Around 4,600 people from more than 139 countries will become Irish citizens at ceremonies taking place in Kerry over today and tomorrow. Minister of State with responsibility for Migration, Colm Brophy is in attendance today. "Irish citizenship is about freedom – freedom to participate fully in society, to vote, to shape the future of your community, to raise your family with security and belonging," Mr Brophy said.

Even Starmer’s resignation speech was an exercise in cliche and narcissism. “I’m resigning to spend more time with my family.” “Forget about the horrors happening across the country, which I’ve helped cause - you should feel sorry for me, me, me.”

🎬🪖🪖 An Ex-special force face rejection by his family 💔😢 and surprise his new boss on attack 🔥😨😨😨 Make sure you enjoy the action movie scene till end 🎥🎥🎥🎥 🍿🍿🍿 https://t.co/sOhe2cvGXA

may God continue to guide bobet's family, especially his siblings, for them to continue the dreams rene had in hopes of making their lives better. he was truly a man for others. you lived a life of purpose & legacy, rene. 🕊

A whole generation has given up on the idea of ever owning a home. This has disastrous impacts on family formation, fertility, personal finances. Remigration restores hope. https://t.co/8YRhNZhTJp

Gentle parenting is for gentle children. 😭😂 https://t.co/QS4jEaXAvq

Jannik Sinner on his family: 🦊 “No, I don’t [superstition about them being in the tournament too early]. I think they just leave me alone with what I need to do. I have my job, and they have their jobs, you know. I know what’s best for me and what I need to do. They know tennis, of course, but not as much as I do because they’ve never played [laughs]. This is also just how we are as a family. We like to support each other, but we also give each other space. And when we’re at home, we never mention tennis—we always talk about different things.

I keep thinking about the moment Divine said goodbye to his family before leaving Nigeria. None of them could have imagined that their next reunion would be this way. He left with dreams and determination, only to be taken far too soon. It's truly devastating. 💔 https://t.co/yRIGwm8ry9

We used to ride our bikes from Ludhiana to Mata Chintpurni in Himachal. We never had any issues with locals or the police — because our families never taught us to play the victim card. We broke rules too. We rarely wore helmets, heavily modified our expensive bikes, and did all the crazy stuff young guys normally do. But whenever there was a fight, we never played the religion card, victim card, or turban card. We handled it with our own strength. Now look at the video where these guys shamed an entire family and extorted money from them. It was clearly their own fault. If it had been locals or guys from any other community in their place, these same people would have immediately pulled out the victim card.

Before you Japa in 2026, confirm the Permanent Residency pathways for each country: 1. Canada – Study Permit → Post-Grad Work Permit → Express Entry / PNP → PR 2. UK – Skilled Worker Visa → ILR after 5 years → Citizenship (Might change in September, 2026) 3. New Zealand – Student Visa → Post-Study Work Visa → Skilled Migrant / Work to Residence → PR 4. Austria – Red-White-Red Card → Permanent Residence after 5 years 5. Sweden – Student Visa → Work Permit → PR after 4–7 years 6. Germany – Student Visa → EU Blue Card / Work Visa → PR after 21–33 months or 5 years 7. France – Student Visa → Work Permit → Long-Term Residence after 5 years 8. Italy – Student Visa → Work Permit → EU Long-Term Residence after 5 years 9. Spain – Student Visa → Work Permit / Highly Skilled Visa → Long-Term Residence after 5 years 10. Portugal – Student Visa → Work Permit → Permanent Residence after 5 years 11. Netherlands – Student Visa → Orientation Year Visa → Highly Skilled Migrant Visa → PR after 5 years 12. Finland – Student Residence Permit → Work Permit → PR after 4 years 13. Norway – Student Permit → Skilled Worker Visa → PR after 3 years 14. Switzerland – Work Permit B → Settlement Permit C after 5–10 years 15. Lithuania – Student Visa → Temporary Residence Permit → Long-Term Residence after 5 years 16. Bulgaria – Student Visa → Work & Residence Permit → Long-Term EU Residence after 5 years 17. Iceland – Work Permit → Permanent Residence after 4 years 18. Japan – Highly Skilled Professional Visa → PR after 1–5 years; standard route around 10 years 19. Russia – Work Permit / Highly Qualified Specialist → Temporary Residence → Permanent Residence (5 years) 20. Australia – Student Visa / Graduate Visa / Skilled Visa → PR pathway → Citizenship after meeting residence rules 21. USA – F1 Student Visa → OPT/STEM OPT → H-1B / Employer Sponsorship → Green Card 22. Luxembourg – Student Residence Permit → Work Permit → Long-Term Residence after 5 years 23. Belgium – Student Visa → Work Permit / Single Permit → Long-Term Residence after 5 years 24. Denmark – Student Permit → Work Permit → Permanent Residence usually after 8 years, sometimes 4 years 25. Ireland – Student Visa → Graduate Visa → Employment Permit → Long-Term Residency after 5 years on eligible work permits 26. Poland – Student Visa → Temporary Residence / Work Permit → EU Long-Term Residence after 5 years 27. Hungary – Student Visa → Work Permit → EU Residence Card / Long-Term Residence after 5 years 28. Greece – Student Visa → Work Residence Permit → Long-Term Residence after 5 years 29. Romania – Student Visa → Work Residence Permit → Long-Term Residence after 5 years 30. Malaysia – Student Pass → Employment Pass → Residence Pass / PR route, but PR is not straightforward 31. China – Student Visa → Work Residence Permit → Permanent Residence route, but PR is highly selective 32. Brazil – Student Visa → Work / Investment / Family Residence Route → Permanent Residence, depending on eligibility Don’t just check tuition and proof of funds. Check if the country has a realistic PR pathway after studies. For further assistance, you can book a paid consultation with me and my team on WhatsApp: +2348039266453.

He wants to get revenge for the rape of a girl and apparently somehow deduced in this scene that the family of one of the rapists “supported the act” (whatever that means) so he’s totally justified in killing all of them, including the teenagers

🎙️“You’ve had some extra time away from playing since Roland Garros. What have you gotten up to during this break?” 🦊 “I took one week off and spent some time with my friends and family, which was really important for me. And then after that, we went straight back to practice, because now there’s a big run coming up—Wimbledon, of course, but we also did a lot of work for the US swing that comes after. We don’t have a lot of time to practice for that usually. I’m always trying to see the positives in situations, and the positive part of going out early of Roland-Garros—even though I would have of course liked to go deeper—is getting some extra time. We try to maximize every day, so there have been a lot of long practice sessions, and I’m very happy with the shape and mental state I’m in right now.”

The parenting books don’t do enough to warn you about the fact that work ends at 5, the bus gets home at 4, and dance starts at 3:30.

a fun parenting reality is that my 3yo who fell asleep on the floor at 6 pm just came wandering into my room at midnight very confused and wanting breakfast.

Kendrick Lamar eviscerated Drake while bringing God & good parenting back to hip hop? Katt Williams was right about 2024.

There are too many bad parents blaming good teachers for their bad parenting.

it has been a very long week and my toddler did not nap today and has asked me approximately 87 thousand times for another applesauce pouch and i am solo parenting and have not eaten today so i just impulsively doordashed some crab dip and a piece of cheesecake???

I was a child protection worker for seven yrs-with a 100% Aboriginal caseload in the Goldfields. In that time I didn’t remove one child. I also didn’t leave a child in an abusive situation. That’s because EVERY Aboriginal family came to attention SOLELY due to struggling with parenting & trauma & attachment from their own removal from family-so I proactively did everything in my power to provide the skills/intensive therapy they needed to stay together. Aboriginal kids in a horrific 82% of cases are being removed for “neglect” -a very preventable thing-we have a system that provides no opportunities for Aboriginal families to heal-removal is a foregone conclusion once they are flagged by the system.

My little parenting anecdote that I have experienced over my short 20 months of being a parent is they will literally do things when they are ready and no sooner. Independent sleep, weaning, etc. And we make ourselves miserable by trying to force them to meet specific timelines

Let's be real. The hardest part of marriage is finding other couples to hang out with who are both in the same stage of parenting as you and which you and your spouse genuinely enjoy spending time with both members of said other couple 😂😂

“How will you explain this to your children.” I’ve seen this several times today, and it’s some backward ass nonsense. Parents don’t have to explain things to their children. Because they are CHILDREN. If a medication, or activity, or food, or anything else turns out to be dangerous… the parent intervenes. That’s the gig. My kids ask me “why not” about 600 times a day. Sometimes, I explain. Sometimes, I don’t. Either way, I’M THE ADULT. I make the calls, based on the things I know, which they are not yet capable of understanding. It’s called PARENTING. We’re not live in butlers. And if your kids grow up, decide they’re trans, and then get mad about it… tough!! Tell them “you’re welcome for your healthy bones, preserved fertility, cancer-free liver, and intact endocrine system. Now that you’re an adult, do with them what you will,” and move along with life. Parents DON’T answer to their children. We do our best to keep them healthy, safe, and whole so they can grow up to be resilient in a world that requires it. Why? Because that world DOESN’T ANSWER TO THEM EITHER.

Amid the many Twitter tradwife voices who scream for mothers to spend every minute with their child, remember the best piece of advice about parenting a 3yo I’ve ever read comes from an actual PhD in child psychology: parents of 3yos should get a babysitter as much as possible.

My daughter is 2 years old. We allow her zero screen time. With exception of Friday nights. We watch one movie of her choice together as a family with popcorn. Tonight, she chose Frozen…for the second week in a row. Because of her limited screen time, she loves to “read” books, speaks full sentences and knows the entire alphabet. I’m a firm believer in the anti-iPad/tablet parenting. Call me crazy but my kid isn’t glued to a screen and is extremely social. The one exception to this rule is 4+ hour plane rides. Let it go. *Bonus content video* Frozen is a rush of emotions as you can see here….

The parenting blackpill is that it's mostly genetics, there's little you can do other than keeping them clothed and fed, and at most you can fuck things up by giving them a bad childhood. The rest is happenstance.

I imagine parenting a toddler is similar to trying to get Microsoft Word to number paragraphs properly.

The further I get into parenting the more it seems like the entire world is one giant conspiracy to rob a child of affordances in every meaningful domain of life

LOL gentle parenting is for the kids. My parents get yelled at. idc anymore 😭