ive met a dude who hasnt said bro once. im impressed. hes very woke

wint

Ranboo

Mark

My room mate is addicted to heroin.

Literally.. hes addicted.

I don't know what to do

I don't like you. I don't like you. I don't like you

Shaan Puri

Yesterday I went to Google HQ with a fake bomb threat and a bunch of cops showed up. (I got escorted out). They told me that Google has a zero-tolerance policy regarding bomb threats, and that if I make another bomb threat in the next six months I will permanently be banned from Google.

Keffals

The Twitter Rules apply to everyone, including me. I don’t always follow them myself, but that’s beside the point.

Elon Musk

im not lying when i say i own a $50000,000,000 hedge fund that mines asteroids for gold. i simply havent told anyone yet

I talked myself out of getting bees. But i kept reading about the bee apocalypse and that keeps me up at night

gale na

i can’t stop thinking about elliott smith

gülce

Twitter should be banned, because free speech is more important than making money

i died 2 years ago & im still here, i remeber everything (except for 9/11)

You are allowed to piss on anyone you want now.

Just walked by a guy with 10 different phones and 10 different headphones

Ryan Letourneau

just found out my parents have been lying about being dead for 22 years. i still love you mom and dad.

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