i bet if youre a democrat, youve never loved someone more than you love the government.

wint

TommyInnit

i have serious doubts about the existence of god because every time I see him or hear his voice he sounds like someone's uncle

𝓂𝓈. 𝓅𝒶𝓉𝒽

im getting so tired of jordan peterson that im gonna start calling him jordan jenkins

i once saw a 5 year old get made fun of for saying hes a wizard

my 2 year old is watching me play minecraft and im like ok, Im going to kill this dragon and he goes no daddy, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

(looking at picture of daughter next to stack of cash) nice. shes getting so big *looks at daughter again* whats she doing?

dream

Tubbo

I don't like you. I don't like you. I don't like you

Shaan Puri

After years of praying to god I finally have my answer.

Thank you lord

Ranboo

I’M NOT ALLOWED TO SAY WHATEVER I WANT ... BUT I’M ALLOWED TO SAY WHATEVER I WANT

Now this just in, the 2 year old's birthday party was a success, they ate 16 salmon salad sandwiches, ate 12 pieces of cake, and drank 2 pitchers of juice

Ryan Letourneau

Whenever someone criticizes capitalism, I can’t help but think of this:

The 2020 Tesla Roadster will be the fastest production car ever made. With 0 to 60 mph in 1.9 sec, 620 mile range, and 10,000 lb of downforce via active suspension, it will be the first true 21st century car. Production begins in 2020, so order

Elon Musk

2016: minecraft is life. 2017: minecraft is life. 2018: minecraft is life. 2019: minecraft is life. 2020: minecraft is life. 2021: minecraft is life. 2022: minecraft is life. 2023: minecraft is life. 2024: minecraft

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