i walked into a police station and they said do you work here? I said i do now

TommyInnit

if im not dead in 10 years ill conquer the world, make deals with russia, and become the 2nd coming of jesus

wint

Ranboo is the only person I know who can do 1+1=5

Spade

George

Ranboo had a dream that he got fired and woke up crying. Woke up to reality and realized it wasn’t a dream.

Ranbalt

i can’t stop thinking about elliott smith

gülce

Left my keys in an Uber. I guess this makes me a Dumbass

i am so sexy and funny and weird and misunderstood and horny and sad and angry and cool and just generally awesome

genetically engineered online girl

im gonna start a business selling Ketchup of Sadness

how am i supposed to know i’m not eating a cockroach if no one tells me

david 🧋

#1 razor licking himejoshi NA

i hate when there's two clouds in one part of the sky and one cloud in another part of the sky and they don't match up at all

just found out my parents have been lying about being dead for 22 years. i still love you mom and dad.

Yesterday I went to Google HQ with a fake bomb threat and a bunch of cops showed up. (I got escorted out). They told me that Google has a zero-tolerance policy regarding bomb threats, and that if I make another bomb threat in the next six months I will permanently be banned from Google.

Keffals

BREAKING: senator joe biden has tested positive for covid

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