just found out my parents have been lying about being dead for 22 years. i still love you mom and dad.

TommyInnit

im in jail for stapling a bunch of money together. i wish i had the bail money

wint

thinking 2019 will be the year i quit this stupid job

im getting so tired of jordan peterson that im gonna start calling him jordan jenkins

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

I’m just gonna say it, if the world ended right now I’d probably be fine. I’m such a nihilist

HAPPY SAINT PATRICK'S DAY! 

I'M A BIG FAN OF SAINT PATRICK'S DAY, I'M ALSO A BIG FAN OF GREEN THINGS, WHO WOULDN'T BE? :D

my 2nd channel is surpassing my first on trending

The Twitter Rules apply to everyone, including me. I don’t always follow them myself, but that’s beside the point.

Cybertruck will be amphibious for short distances, able to travel between small islands

3 things in my life (that I'm super proud of):

1) 

2) 

3)

Just sold my soul to satan for 1 million dollars

Just been banned from the Apple Store for filming a 5 minute video on how to take apart a Macbook Pro