i walked into a police station and they said do you work here? I said i do now

TommyInnit

no. im not crying. im laughing. hard. its just so good.

david 🧋

1.2 billion white people 1.2 billion black people 1.2 billion white people 1.2 billion black people

Ranboo sickness update:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

im getting so tired of jordan peterson that im gonna start calling him jordan jenkins

thinking 2019 will be the year i quit this stupid job

my 2 year old is watching me play minecraft and im like ok, Im going to kill this dragon and he goes no daddy, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

how am i supposed to know i’m not eating a cockroach if no one tells me

America, I’m back and what’s more I’m armed and dangerous.

I can't stand the harry potter characters

...i'm not saying we can never make another star wars movie but if we do, i'm dead...

I’M NOT ALLOWED TO SAY WHATEVER I WANT ... BUT I’M ALLOWED TO SAY WHATEVER I WANT

its like i cant even but with more profanity.