There is nothing better than getting a new zelda game

Tipy

omg i just found out i got accepted into harvard law school!😭😭😭

prezoh

if im not dead in 10 years ill conquer the world, make deals with russia, and become the 2nd coming of jesus

wint

omg I’m getting a hair cut 😂😂😂

Quackity

im not lying when i say i own a $50000,000,000 hedge fund that mines asteroids for gold. i simply havent told anyone yet

i’ve run out of reasons to NOT pee my pants

Wilbur Soot

I’m watching an old episode of The Office, and Dwight is talking to an Amish dude. The Amish dude says “I don’t understand, what are you doin’?” Dwight says “I’m going door to door selling vacuum cleaners.” The Amish dude says “You mean you’re a salesman?” Dwight says “No, I’m a vacuum salesman.”

Jerma

You are allowed to piss on anyone you want now.

Mark

Twitter should ban all political ads, because they are inherently manipulative and misleading

Elon Musk

splatoon 3 is garbage and splatoon 2 is garbage

nope1game

I talked myself out of getting bees. But i kept reading about the bee apocalypse and that keeps me up at night

gale na

2020 is going to be the year of the 2020 vision 🇺🇸

I’m just gonna say it, if the world ended right now I’d probably be fine. I’m such a nihilist

The Scarlet Pumpernickel

ive met a dude who hasnt said bro once. im impressed. hes very woke

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