ive met a dude who hasnt said bro once. im impressed. hes very woke

wint

The Twitter Rules apply to everyone, including me. I don’t always follow them myself, but that’s beside the point.

Elon Musk

This is me, and anyone who disagrees with me is a bot.

We will protect religious freedom and a woman’s right to choose.

President Biden

“I feel really offended when you make jokes about white guys because you just look like every white guy” - a white guy

Vaush 🇺🇸 🇧🇫

i died 2 years ago & im still here, i remeber everything (except for 9/11)

Mark

PLEASE HELP ME I'M GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW :(

Tubbo

so tbh, i’ve never hated anyone as much as i do taylor swift.

david 🧋

Ranboo

dude, i still don’t think it’s fair to say that the ps4 is a playstation 4; it’s just the ps4

sorrel "the mummy" kerr-jung🎃

A crazy day, got super drunk, drank some bad beer, had an epic tongue twister, lost my voice, got a cold, drank some bad whiskey, lost my voice, got a fever, drank some bad bourbon, lost my voice, had an epic tongue twister, got my arm cut off, drank some bad beer, lost my voice, got my throat cut open, drank some

vinny

omg just noticed my prozac prescription has expired

just found out my parents have been lying about being dead for 22 years. i still love you mom and dad.

TommyInnit

i wish i could be as dumb as that girl over there

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