1984: “All animals are equal”
2019: “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others”

Elon Musk

thank you guys so much for all of your support, it means the world to me.

dream

how am i supposed to know i’m not eating a cockroach if no one tells me

david 🧋

i wish i could just accost people on the street and be like “hey, you’re handsome”

A girl asked “why are you so short?”

I said “because I am”

She said “well why do you keep hitting me in the head”

I said “because you’re taller than me”

She said “but I’m a girl”

I said “what difference does that make”

She said “I’m going to report you”

I said “well go ahead”

Ranboo

i feel like i should feel guilty for doing this but i definitely dont

henry/myriad: mind funeral

how am I supposed to get super high when I can’t smoke weed

little lord fuckleroy

i’ve been writing in invisible ink this whole time

genetically engineered online girl

just realized i’ve been taking laxatives since high school

Wilbur Soot

I can't stand the harry potter characters

SP(ook)Y

ive been on the antidepressant good vibes for like 3 months now and i dont even know if it works. my psychiatrist is a total hack

wint

2016: minecraft is life. 2017: minecraft is life. 2018: minecraft is life. 2019: minecraft is life. 2020: minecraft is life. 2021: minecraft is life. 2022: minecraft is life. 2023: minecraft is life. 2024: minecraft

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