That's why today, I signed into law the Women’s Equality Act.

President Biden

i walked into a police station and they said do you work here? I said i do now

TommyInnit

Mark

im not lying when i say i own a $50000,000,000 hedge fund that mines asteroids for gold. i simply havent told anyone yet

wint

You are allowed to piss on anyone you want now.

my 2 year old is watching me play minecraft and im like ok, Im going to kill this dragon and he goes no daddy, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

im in jail for stapling a bunch of money together. i wish i had the bail money

i once saw a 5 year old get made fun of for saying hes a wizard

After years of praying to god I finally have my answer.

Thank you lord

Ranboo

everyone, the moment you die, remember that this moment is exactly HOW IT SHOULD BE

SungWon Cho

I don't like you. I don't like you. I don't like you

Shaan Puri

the best way not to get fired is to never work

andrewchen

if im not dead in 10 years ill conquer the world, make deals with russia, and become the 2nd coming of jesus

When was the last time you felt really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really

Sam Parr

I can't stand the harry potter characters

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