I’m gonna be on Venus, and Venus is gonna be on Venus.

Jerma

why do people go to toronto and montreal?

xavi

We're here to build products, not portfolios.

Ashish ✦ ashuxi.eth

1. 5 y/o boy with no friends
2. 13 y/o girl with no friends
3. 17 y/o boy with no friends
4. 18 y/o girl with no friends
5. 21 y/o boy with no friends
6.

TommyInnit

“My parents wanted me to be a doctor or a lawyer so I studied science...” - that doctor is gonna be dead in 5 years

mesh509

George

the FBI just kicked my door in looking for the 2 fugitives, 2 fugitives?!?

tehlamb

Halloween Stu 🐦

im in jail for stapling a bunch of money together. i wish i had the bail money

wint

i hate that mcc bc i hate that mcc bc i hate that mcc bc i hate that mcc bc i hate that mcc bc i hate that mcc bc i hate that mcc bc i hate that mcc bc i hate that mcc bc i hate that mcc

soph(antom) 👻🐷 | TOTK IN 200 DAYS!

Been watching a lot of brit shows lately. The Office, Peep Show, and Black Books. Why? Because I’m 10 years old, and that’s how I roll.

I’m just gonna say it, if the world ended right now I’d probably be fine. I’m such a nihilist

The Scarlet Pumpernickel

what if instead of banning all guns, we banned all BULLETS??

When you die, if you get to choose between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, then eternal happiness is better than eternal nothingness.

Elon Musk

I’m watching an old episode of The Office, and Dwight is talking to an Amish dude. The Amish dude says “I don’t understand, what are you doin’?” Dwight says “I’m going door to door selling vacuum cleaners.” The Amish dude says “You mean you’re a salesman?” Dwight says “No, I’m a vacuum salesman.”

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