i have serious doubts about the existence of god because every time I see him or hear his voice he sounds like someone's uncle

𝓂𝓈. 𝓅𝒶𝓉𝒽

Elon Musk

Just finished reading a biography of Henry David Thoreau and realized that Thoreau was America's first hippie

1984: “All animals are equal”
2019: “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others”

thank you guys so much for all of your support, it means the world to me.

good afternoon everyone, this is your last chance...

i havent been getting laid in over a year. im not angry. im just disappointed.

I am being hunted by a 15 year old.

I am scared.

i’m gonna put 2 shows on mute while i finish this paper

My room mate is addicted to heroin.

Literally.. hes addicted.

I don't know what to do

Today Hillary won more votes than Donald Trump did in 2016.

im gonna start a business selling Ketchup of Sadness

im in jail for stapling a bunch of money together. i wish i had the bail money

tfw, you wait 10 years for a 10 year reunion then realize 10 years isnt even enough

(In response to the tweet someone sent me regarding my injury)