i dont get why u dont just buy urself a 9/11 santa suit and wear it on 9/11

wint

TommyInnit

i wonder if the cia will let me bring a kitten into the office

Just sold my soul to satan for 1 million dollars

Ranboo

okay, so this video is gonna be about george, and I wanna talk about george, because today is not George Day, it’s George Day, so I’m gonna talk about george today, okay

dream

I am an angry man. I will destroy everything in my world. For I am the Punisher.

pobnellion

i walked into a police station and they said do you work here? I said i do now

When you die, if you get to choose between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, then eternal happiness is better than eternal nothingness.

Elon Musk

Never tweet anything you wouldn’t want the whole world to see.

Went to a weed shop for the first time in my life and couldn’t believe how much weed costs.

I feel old.

Vaush 🇺🇸 🇧🇫

You are allowed to piss on anyone you want now.

Mark

thinking 2019 will be the year i quit this stupid job

James

im getting so tired of jordan peterson that im gonna start calling him jordan jenkins

im in jail for stapling a bunch of money together. i wish i had the bail money

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